There are times in our lives when we must tend to/prune our relationships with people, places or things or end our relationship with them completely.
One way to do this in a good way is cord cutting. For details in cord cutting read here. When doing this kind of ceremony, it is helpful to have a tool specific to the task. The right kind of cord cutting tool for you can be created or found.
Essentially, what you are looking for is an object that looks and or feels like it can be used to sever something. Items that come to mind are rocks, crystals, sticks, or something more literal like a blade.
As this is a metaphysical tool, I tend to enjoy using something that I can ascribe a metaphysical property to that makes it feel different than how it works in ordinary reality. For my cord cutting tool, I use a quartz crystal that I imbue with the intention that it will act as this kind of severing implement. If being more literal works for you, stick with something like a pair of scissors or a knife. Keep in mind that you will be holding this tool close to your body. I suggest that if you use a blade, that it be a dull blade.
Asking whichever object you choose if it wants to be a cord cutting tool is important. This is a conversation held in the in-between spaces. You can certainly ask outloud if an object wishes to work with you in this way and asking quietly, internally, from the heart space is good too. Using your heart is both a good way to ask for and receive information. Listen with your heart for the answer. It may be an automatic yes or no that you hear your heart say, or it may be more of a sensation of either acceptance or repulsion.
Once you have found an object that wants to work with you, it is time to create it. The creation portion of this work must include an imbuing/programming of the object’s energy. It may also include adorning the item with certain embellishments or symbols that make sense to you and the task you are assigning it.
When creating a cord cutting tool, whether it is a literal object or less literal, it is important to clear the object of any energy that it is holding. We want to bring the energy of the tool to a place of neutrality. For instance, if you are using a pair of sewing scissors, you want to clear those scissors of the “sewing scissor” programming. Found or purchased objects may carry energy from previous owners, those who handled it before you, or the environment it has been sitting in.
Good ways to clear energy of their programming are: burying them in the earth for 24 hours, washing them in clean water holding in your heart and your mind that you are clearing the object of its programming, holding the object over a flame and asking the flame to clear the object (be careful of how close you are holding the object to the flame), washing the object in clearing smoke (white sage, mugwart, cedar, lady’s mantel), reiki, or simply holding the object between your palms and sending clearing energy from your heart into your hands and into the object.
Once you have cleared the object from any and all programming, it is time to imbue it with the programming of being a cord cutting tool. Imbuement involves taking a specific energy and connecting it with an object or receiving place/space. In this case, we are giving an object a direction or a way to operate. We wish to give the object that has agreed to work with us as a cord cutting tool the programming to cut energetic cords.
To do this, hold the object in your hands and close to your heart. Hold in your mind's eye and in your heart the image of this object cutting cords. Imagine this tool cutting energetic attachments between you and a person, place or thing. Say out loud that you are imbuing this object with the program to cut energetic cords and attachments between you and other persons, places or things. Reading the article on cord cutting will be helpful in understanding this visual. You are essentially taking the energy of the action you are holding in your mind and your heart and giving it to this object for it to absorb and use as direction.
Sit for several minutes in this space of imbuement. The longer you sit with the object in this way, the more powerful the object will be. Once this process feels complete, wrap the object in a special cloth or place it in a container that only holds this object. Only use this object for cord cutting ceremonies.
Our sacred tools become living beings; steady and loyal aids and guides in our work. As you work with it, you will be building a relationship with it. The more you use it the more effective it will be. Just like honing a skill or a craft, repetition creates adeptness.
We get attached to people, places and things.
As we move through our life, we create energetic connections to the world around us.
Sometimes these connections are healthy and good. They allow us to bond to individuals and create good relationships with our places of employment, our community, our practices, and other areas of our lives that we are committed to. These kinds of cords allow for a continued exchange of life force that feeds the relationship.
Sometimes these energetic connections become unhealthy and they work against our well being. A romantic relationship or friendship might begin to carry anger or sadness, an employer may begin to treat us unfairly, a community may hurt us, or a practice might become more of an addiction rather than a tool for balance, rhythm, or restoration.
Having an energetic connection that feeds what is unhealthy is like keeping a dead or dying part of a plant connected to what is still vibrant and living. Cutting unhealthy cords to people, places and things allows for vitality to go to the places that are most beneficial. Like pruning a plant, in cord cutting we remove the places that are dead, dying, or sick. This kind of energetic pruning creates shifts in our ordinary reality. Problems may become solved more easily, behaviors can shift, and relationships that need to evolve or end entirely are possible results from cord cutting.
Sometimes cord cutting helps something that has come to completion to fully end. Perhaps we have moved on from a job or we have broken up with a friend or lover. Maybe we have moved from one location to a new one or perhaps we are letting go of a bad habit. In this instance, we want to cut cords that might still be feeding that past relationship so that we have all of our energy going towards what we want to support and be in connection with.
In the instances where we do not necessarily want to end or extricate ourselves from a circumstance or situation, removing the unhealthy cords gives our relationship and commitment to something the best chance it has to be as healthy and vibrant as it can be. It allows us to show up for our relationship as the best version of ourselves without the energy of whatever is not a match for flourishment.
In the instances where we want something that is coming to or has come to completion to fully complete, cord cutting is the energetic equivalent of taking your name off the utilities; cleaning out your desk at a former workplace, or asking for your sweatshirt back from a former partner. It’s the final housekeeping detail that allows for there to no longer be any engagement or interaction with what you are moving away from.
I will give a brief outline of how to go through a cord cutting ritual that can be modified to fit your particular circumstance. Before doing so, let’s talk a little bit about the energy that makes up the cord(s) we are removing.
Both our own energy and the energy of whatever we are corded into make up the cord. There can also be energies entangled in these cords that are not a direct participant in the relationship, but they do affect the relationship indirectly. For example: a cord between you and a job will have your own energy and quite possibly one or more of the following - the energy of your boss, the energy of the workplace, the energy of the field you work within, and the energy of what you believe about work and financial stability. You can let your mind wander and find many other energies that may make up that cord as well.
It’s important to understand that when we are cutting cords, we are only working with our own energy intentionally. All other energies involved are to simply be released. How other energy is managed is up to whomever or whatever that energy belongs to. We can ask that the energetic realms tend to the energies that are being released in a good way so that it can be retrieved by whomever it belongs to. It’s important not to ask for anything on behalf of someone or something else without permission.
When cutting a cord, it’s a good idea to ask that our energy that was feeding that cord be removed and cleared of any sickness and returned to us. In this way, we are not letting our energy simply go away or be returned to us still vibrating with the energy of the unhealthy connection. We are retrieving it and restoring it. It is in this space that we can ask that the energy in the cord that does not belong to us be handled in a good way and returned to who it belongs to.
Steps of cord cutting.
Tending a relationship
Ending a relationship
Sometimes this process can be thorough and complete in one sitting. Some relationships may require a repeat of this ceremony before we feel like the energetic attachments are thoroughly gone. If this ceremony does not feel like enough, there may be stronger attachments or other connections that need to be looked at.
I see the kinds of circumstances where we get stuck in our own energy maintenance much like I understand how a surgeon cannot do surgery on himself. Just because a surgeon knows how to do surgery, doesn’t mean he can tend to himself in the same way he can tend to another person.
Seeking out the care of an energy medicine practitioner is a good way to ensure that attachments you wish to clear are done so effectively. An experienced and well trained energy medicine practitioner will be able to see what you cannot see and will be able to navigate and untangle energy that has come together in a more complicated or involved way.
Dreams carry the messages of the unseen realms.
Some believe the gods, the universe, source energy, our higher selves use our dream time as a way of bypassing our conscious mind in order to get to us directly a message we might otherwise dismiss if received during wakefulness.
We hold our dreams as magical and mystical because the scenarios played out are often outside of the realm of our ordinary reality. It is the space where the gods use our imagination to personify and amplify our greatest fears. Through our dizzying obsession with and denial of those things we do not want to see unfold we give fodder to the gods to play and work with in their musings around how to help the humans integrate their shadows.
Pre-creating our world through our fixation on what we dread (and I assert that denial is just as potent as preoccupation) traps our time lines into the currents of what we would least like to experience. Our dreams show us our worst visions as our addiction to foreseeing/denying the worst outcome surges vitality into their manifestation in our minds. The gods know what they are doing. They know in order to be set free from us, our nightmares must first be felt and seen. Why? So that they can leave us.
How does this work? How to release ourselves from forecasting a future held in tides of dread?
Spaciousness. Allowing for there to be more than just one outcome.
Instead of anchoring into our reality the nastiest circumstances our frightened egos can conjur by persistently paying attention to them or ignoring them, let them instead fly free. What do I mean by this?
Honor the option that our anxiety presents as a possible outcome by looking at it and allowing it to be just that. A possibility. One of many. Suppressing it will only serve to snare it in our system. Let the dread rise up to its fullest strength and then watch and feel it dissipate in the knowingness that there is an infinite field of potentials that are just as likely.
Surprise happens every day. Let yourself be surprised.